Saturday, July 23, 2011
Sunday, July 17, 2011
That's what happy mommies are made of!
I've recently started reading a book that lets its readers in on the secrets of being a "Happy Mommy" (oh okay, laugh if you want!). This book is amazingly candid about motherhood and all that it 's made out to be and is often not.
Since becoming a mother I've often felt, in all honesty, that motherhood is terribly overrated. All that talk about instant mother-child bonding, a mother being able to understand every cry, every whimper....I've not felt any of that. But maybe that's just me. Perhaps, I lack a certain sixth sense that women are supposed to have. For me, being a mother has been one heck of a journey and I don't think I've even left the station yet. I'm far too busy tackling potty training, cleaning pee off the floor, diffusing tantrums (that seem to be intensifying in their frequency and strength!) to really bother myself with something as inane as my happiness.
Having now read a few pages of my 'happiness handbook' I've started to question whether I really am happy or not. Was I happier before becoming a mother? I guess that in a way I was. I have friends who are single, independent, 'non mothers' who definitely seem a lot happier than me. My life is no longer mine. It's all about my child. I wake up in the morning for him and everything I do through the day is for him.
Ask me though if I would have it any other way and I'd say a definite no! That's what is so amazing about motherhood. Given the chance to go back in time, nearly every mother will say that she would without doubt become a mother again. Nothing in this world can ever compare to being a mom.
As far as happiness is concerned, is it ever a constant in anyone's life? Like everything, it comes and goes. If there's anything that motherhood has taught me, it's about finding tit bits of happiness in the smallest of things. Trust me, even a dirty diaper can bring a smile to my face. I'm just happy that he did a good poo! Can you then imagine how deliriously happy I am when Neel plants a kiss on my cheek?
So, am I a "Happy Mommy"? I most definitely, positively, without an ounce of a doubt, am!
Since becoming a mother I've often felt, in all honesty, that motherhood is terribly overrated. All that talk about instant mother-child bonding, a mother being able to understand every cry, every whimper....I've not felt any of that. But maybe that's just me. Perhaps, I lack a certain sixth sense that women are supposed to have. For me, being a mother has been one heck of a journey and I don't think I've even left the station yet. I'm far too busy tackling potty training, cleaning pee off the floor, diffusing tantrums (that seem to be intensifying in their frequency and strength!) to really bother myself with something as inane as my happiness.
Having now read a few pages of my 'happiness handbook' I've started to question whether I really am happy or not. Was I happier before becoming a mother? I guess that in a way I was. I have friends who are single, independent, 'non mothers' who definitely seem a lot happier than me. My life is no longer mine. It's all about my child. I wake up in the morning for him and everything I do through the day is for him.
Ask me though if I would have it any other way and I'd say a definite no! That's what is so amazing about motherhood. Given the chance to go back in time, nearly every mother will say that she would without doubt become a mother again. Nothing in this world can ever compare to being a mom.
As far as happiness is concerned, is it ever a constant in anyone's life? Like everything, it comes and goes. If there's anything that motherhood has taught me, it's about finding tit bits of happiness in the smallest of things. Trust me, even a dirty diaper can bring a smile to my face. I'm just happy that he did a good poo! Can you then imagine how deliriously happy I am when Neel plants a kiss on my cheek?
So, am I a "Happy Mommy"? I most definitely, positively, without an ounce of a doubt, am!
Friday, July 1, 2011
Page 3 play schools!
When Neel was 18 months old, we applied to a popular South Delhi pre school for admission to a 'mother-child' programme and got rejected. Why? Because apparently we didn't know the right people who would pull the right strings of the right people in this so called right school.
It's been a few months since this happened and although things have worked out for the better, now that Neel is going to start preschool in a far better school by my estimation, I still think back in anger to those days of feeling completely dejected. How on earth can an 18 month old be rejected from anything? How can a baby not fulfill any criteria for a play school or play group. Obviously, it had more to do with us as parents. We just didn't know the right people. Never before had I been exposed to such ridiculousness that is our education system in India. We had been naive. We just didn't think that an 18 month old could become a victim to such a corrupt system so early on in life.
I have since written a letter to the chairman of this school, which my husband won't let me send. I've decided to post it here because I have to vent my anger somehow:
Dear Mr. Chairman,
My 18 month old son's admission application to your pre school was recently rejected. I find it hard to believe how an 18 month old can have any short comings on the basis of which he gets rejected to the first institution he has ever applied to in his life. Yes, I have heard from your
school staff that a fair lucky draw takes place and that the admission procedure is completely transparent. I wasn't invited to any lucky draw event and nor was I witness to any, so I apologise if I don't take your word for it. If the entire procedure is transparent, make it visible and I'm sure us parents would be more than happy to participate.
I live barely 5 minutes away from your preschool and am aware that a couple of children in my neighbourhood have started attending the new session in your school. I have been told that their parents pulled the 'right strings' with the faculty of your school. I obviously was under
the impression that a popular and highly sought after school such as yours would not resort to such 'discriminatory' practices when it came to providing the first step towards a formal education for thousands of innocent young minds. These are just small babies Mr. Chairman. How can a school discriminate one from the other on the basis of what car their parents drive or who they party with on a Friday night?
I was advised by many people to literally stand outside your school everyday and beg for admission for my baby. I do know of many who have done this and they still were rejected. My principles and my self respect would never allow me to grovel for something which is my child's fundamental right. I have been educated in one of the finest boarding schools in India and I sat an admission test at the age of 6 to secure my admission there. I cannot remember seeing my parents bow to such disgracefulness as what is seen in schools such as yours.
Things have however worked out for the better. My child will be starting school in a much better and far more child-centric school. I know that your school's popularity is short lived. No institution built on dishonesty can survive.
Best regards,
It's been a few months since this happened and although things have worked out for the better, now that Neel is going to start preschool in a far better school by my estimation, I still think back in anger to those days of feeling completely dejected. How on earth can an 18 month old be rejected from anything? How can a baby not fulfill any criteria for a play school or play group. Obviously, it had more to do with us as parents. We just didn't know the right people. Never before had I been exposed to such ridiculousness that is our education system in India. We had been naive. We just didn't think that an 18 month old could become a victim to such a corrupt system so early on in life.
I have since written a letter to the chairman of this school, which my husband won't let me send. I've decided to post it here because I have to vent my anger somehow:
Dear Mr. Chairman,
My 18 month old son's admission application to your pre school was recently rejected. I find it hard to believe how an 18 month old can have any short comings on the basis of which he gets rejected to the first institution he has ever applied to in his life. Yes, I have heard from your
school staff that a fair lucky draw takes place and that the admission procedure is completely transparent. I wasn't invited to any lucky draw event and nor was I witness to any, so I apologise if I don't take your word for it. If the entire procedure is transparent, make it visible and I'm sure us parents would be more than happy to participate.
I live barely 5 minutes away from your preschool and am aware that a couple of children in my neighbourhood have started attending the new session in your school. I have been told that their parents pulled the 'right strings' with the faculty of your school. I obviously was under
the impression that a popular and highly sought after school such as yours would not resort to such 'discriminatory' practices when it came to providing the first step towards a formal education for thousands of innocent young minds. These are just small babies Mr. Chairman. How can a school discriminate one from the other on the basis of what car their parents drive or who they party with on a Friday night?
I was advised by many people to literally stand outside your school everyday and beg for admission for my baby. I do know of many who have done this and they still were rejected. My principles and my self respect would never allow me to grovel for something which is my child's fundamental right. I have been educated in one of the finest boarding schools in India and I sat an admission test at the age of 6 to secure my admission there. I cannot remember seeing my parents bow to such disgracefulness as what is seen in schools such as yours.
Things have however worked out for the better. My child will be starting school in a much better and far more child-centric school. I know that your school's popularity is short lived. No institution built on dishonesty can survive.
Best regards,
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