Oh My God, do I need a pick me up today! My eyes just won't stay open, my head feels like a ton of bricks and my body doesn't seem to be responding to my brain at all. And it's only Monday! I still have a whole week of early wake ups left.
Neel is at school for four hours now, the longest he's ever been away from me. At first, I didn't really know what to do with my time and spent most of it staring at the clock, counting the minutes that were left. I've completely forgotten how to have some 'me time' now. Which is why it really gets my goat when people now say,
"oh my god, four hours! What do you do for so long?" And,
"Lucky you! Now you've got so much time to yourself." Or,
"Enjoy your four hours off."
That last one was from my husband this morning.
First of all, thank you everyone for your concern for my "FREE TIME" and also for quanitifying it constantly and reminding me on every occassion that I now have so called "time off".
Seriously people, I've spent the past three years of my life obsessing about my child. I still do, more so now than ever before. I wake up in the morning for him and spend each and every hour of the day trying to make him happy, healthy and comfortable. When he is at school, I clean for him, plan his menu, his day and prepare for him coming home. I'm all about him!
I've spent sleepless nights working at the office, made some really lenghty presentations to some very difficult clients and I've survived some very nasty office politics. I did this for many years and I realised that as long as I could come home and distance myself from work, it was easy.
Being a stay at home mom is A LOT harder! I say this because I have experienced both worlds. Funnily though, I've never been so content in my life. I may not be bringing in the cheque, but I feel like I've found my calling even though on many, many occassions I find myself holding on to the little bit of sanity I have left.
The point I'm trying to make is that everybody gets some time to unwind at the end of the day. I haven't had that for over three years now. So, if I am getting my precious four hours, let me have it without having to hear from you how lucky I am to have it.
I definitely deserve it!
Sunday, April 15, 2012
Thursday, April 12, 2012
Week 1 of School - We Survived!
Thank God it's Friday! It's been one hellova week for us in this toddler household. Neel's new preschool demands attendance at 8:30 am, which to us lazy folk is the crack of dawn. Wake up time therefore is 7 am, which to us is the middle of the night. Okay yes, we have been very reluctant enforcing early wake up with Neel but he is afterall still a baby. He has his whole life ahead of him waking up to the shrill ringing of an alarm at all ungodly hours of the day or night.
Once he is awake, Neel insists on brushing his teeth with his Dad. I really don't know why he just doesnt seem to trust my oral hygiene methods, but whatever works! The challenge then is to feed him. We try literally EVERYTHING to coax him to eat. The last fifteen minutes is left for grooming, bathing and what have you. Then is the dash to school in the car with me cooing about how fun school is going to be. Trust me, singing Old Mcdonald had a farm and mooing like a cow at red lights, while looking like you've been dragged through a hedge backwards, does raise a few eyebrows. But what the heck, Neel is happy and goes to school with a little skip in his step and that's all that matters.
We've been doing this for a week now and I feel like I need to scrape myself off the floor, quite literally! Help, how am I going to get through the next fourteen years of his school life?
Once he is awake, Neel insists on brushing his teeth with his Dad. I really don't know why he just doesnt seem to trust my oral hygiene methods, but whatever works! The challenge then is to feed him. We try literally EVERYTHING to coax him to eat. The last fifteen minutes is left for grooming, bathing and what have you. Then is the dash to school in the car with me cooing about how fun school is going to be. Trust me, singing Old Mcdonald had a farm and mooing like a cow at red lights, while looking like you've been dragged through a hedge backwards, does raise a few eyebrows. But what the heck, Neel is happy and goes to school with a little skip in his step and that's all that matters.
We've been doing this for a week now and I feel like I need to scrape myself off the floor, quite literally! Help, how am I going to get through the next fourteen years of his school life?
Monday, September 5, 2011
The Terrible Twos!
Today was a day when I watched in horror as my sweet two year old morphed into a tantrum throwing, mummy eating monster! And oh my god was it scary! The terrible twos have descended on us unsuspecting, innocent parents.
We've survived a day of countless tantrums, a split lower lip, three bumps on the head and god alone knows how many bruises! I, on the other hand, am somehow holding on to my poor little heart, which has suffered innumerable minor strokes and shocks. I need a drink! No, hang on, I need a bloody barrel full of the stuff!
Neel is finally asleep. You have no idea the amount of relief that goes into saying that! I can sink into bed and breathe....finally!
How long will this last? I asked a wise mother in the park the other day. Oh not long, was the reply. Just till he's about six years old. I smiled while I screamed in my head. Are you frigging crazy? I'm going to be crippled and ready for an asylum by then. Sheesh.....
We have our good days too. Those days are far and few but are a reminder that it really is worth it. The best thing about my two year old is that he is stinking cute! I really can't ever be angry with him for more than 5 seconds, even when I catch him using his toothbrush as a loo brush. Heck, it's part and parcel of being a toddler and how else will he learn that not all brushes are used for cleaning the toilet?
The good thing is that my little one is full of spunk. He tests every boundary, every limit and that's what I love about him. He makes me step out of my comfort zone constantly. He's what makes me tick!
It might sound like my child is out of control but it's with very bump that he'll grow and with every tantrum that he'll learn.
Bring it all on again tomorrow!
We've survived a day of countless tantrums, a split lower lip, three bumps on the head and god alone knows how many bruises! I, on the other hand, am somehow holding on to my poor little heart, which has suffered innumerable minor strokes and shocks. I need a drink! No, hang on, I need a bloody barrel full of the stuff!
Neel is finally asleep. You have no idea the amount of relief that goes into saying that! I can sink into bed and breathe....finally!
How long will this last? I asked a wise mother in the park the other day. Oh not long, was the reply. Just till he's about six years old. I smiled while I screamed in my head. Are you frigging crazy? I'm going to be crippled and ready for an asylum by then. Sheesh.....
We have our good days too. Those days are far and few but are a reminder that it really is worth it. The best thing about my two year old is that he is stinking cute! I really can't ever be angry with him for more than 5 seconds, even when I catch him using his toothbrush as a loo brush. Heck, it's part and parcel of being a toddler and how else will he learn that not all brushes are used for cleaning the toilet?
The good thing is that my little one is full of spunk. He tests every boundary, every limit and that's what I love about him. He makes me step out of my comfort zone constantly. He's what makes me tick!
It might sound like my child is out of control but it's with very bump that he'll grow and with every tantrum that he'll learn.
Bring it all on again tomorrow!
Saturday, July 23, 2011
Sunday, July 17, 2011
That's what happy mommies are made of!
I've recently started reading a book that lets its readers in on the secrets of being a "Happy Mommy" (oh okay, laugh if you want!). This book is amazingly candid about motherhood and all that it 's made out to be and is often not.
Since becoming a mother I've often felt, in all honesty, that motherhood is terribly overrated. All that talk about instant mother-child bonding, a mother being able to understand every cry, every whimper....I've not felt any of that. But maybe that's just me. Perhaps, I lack a certain sixth sense that women are supposed to have. For me, being a mother has been one heck of a journey and I don't think I've even left the station yet. I'm far too busy tackling potty training, cleaning pee off the floor, diffusing tantrums (that seem to be intensifying in their frequency and strength!) to really bother myself with something as inane as my happiness.
Having now read a few pages of my 'happiness handbook' I've started to question whether I really am happy or not. Was I happier before becoming a mother? I guess that in a way I was. I have friends who are single, independent, 'non mothers' who definitely seem a lot happier than me. My life is no longer mine. It's all about my child. I wake up in the morning for him and everything I do through the day is for him.
Ask me though if I would have it any other way and I'd say a definite no! That's what is so amazing about motherhood. Given the chance to go back in time, nearly every mother will say that she would without doubt become a mother again. Nothing in this world can ever compare to being a mom.
As far as happiness is concerned, is it ever a constant in anyone's life? Like everything, it comes and goes. If there's anything that motherhood has taught me, it's about finding tit bits of happiness in the smallest of things. Trust me, even a dirty diaper can bring a smile to my face. I'm just happy that he did a good poo! Can you then imagine how deliriously happy I am when Neel plants a kiss on my cheek?
So, am I a "Happy Mommy"? I most definitely, positively, without an ounce of a doubt, am!
Since becoming a mother I've often felt, in all honesty, that motherhood is terribly overrated. All that talk about instant mother-child bonding, a mother being able to understand every cry, every whimper....I've not felt any of that. But maybe that's just me. Perhaps, I lack a certain sixth sense that women are supposed to have. For me, being a mother has been one heck of a journey and I don't think I've even left the station yet. I'm far too busy tackling potty training, cleaning pee off the floor, diffusing tantrums (that seem to be intensifying in their frequency and strength!) to really bother myself with something as inane as my happiness.
Having now read a few pages of my 'happiness handbook' I've started to question whether I really am happy or not. Was I happier before becoming a mother? I guess that in a way I was. I have friends who are single, independent, 'non mothers' who definitely seem a lot happier than me. My life is no longer mine. It's all about my child. I wake up in the morning for him and everything I do through the day is for him.
Ask me though if I would have it any other way and I'd say a definite no! That's what is so amazing about motherhood. Given the chance to go back in time, nearly every mother will say that she would without doubt become a mother again. Nothing in this world can ever compare to being a mom.
As far as happiness is concerned, is it ever a constant in anyone's life? Like everything, it comes and goes. If there's anything that motherhood has taught me, it's about finding tit bits of happiness in the smallest of things. Trust me, even a dirty diaper can bring a smile to my face. I'm just happy that he did a good poo! Can you then imagine how deliriously happy I am when Neel plants a kiss on my cheek?
So, am I a "Happy Mommy"? I most definitely, positively, without an ounce of a doubt, am!
Friday, July 1, 2011
Page 3 play schools!
When Neel was 18 months old, we applied to a popular South Delhi pre school for admission to a 'mother-child' programme and got rejected. Why? Because apparently we didn't know the right people who would pull the right strings of the right people in this so called right school.
It's been a few months since this happened and although things have worked out for the better, now that Neel is going to start preschool in a far better school by my estimation, I still think back in anger to those days of feeling completely dejected. How on earth can an 18 month old be rejected from anything? How can a baby not fulfill any criteria for a play school or play group. Obviously, it had more to do with us as parents. We just didn't know the right people. Never before had I been exposed to such ridiculousness that is our education system in India. We had been naive. We just didn't think that an 18 month old could become a victim to such a corrupt system so early on in life.
I have since written a letter to the chairman of this school, which my husband won't let me send. I've decided to post it here because I have to vent my anger somehow:
Dear Mr. Chairman,
My 18 month old son's admission application to your pre school was recently rejected. I find it hard to believe how an 18 month old can have any short comings on the basis of which he gets rejected to the first institution he has ever applied to in his life. Yes, I have heard from your
school staff that a fair lucky draw takes place and that the admission procedure is completely transparent. I wasn't invited to any lucky draw event and nor was I witness to any, so I apologise if I don't take your word for it. If the entire procedure is transparent, make it visible and I'm sure us parents would be more than happy to participate.
I live barely 5 minutes away from your preschool and am aware that a couple of children in my neighbourhood have started attending the new session in your school. I have been told that their parents pulled the 'right strings' with the faculty of your school. I obviously was under
the impression that a popular and highly sought after school such as yours would not resort to such 'discriminatory' practices when it came to providing the first step towards a formal education for thousands of innocent young minds. These are just small babies Mr. Chairman. How can a school discriminate one from the other on the basis of what car their parents drive or who they party with on a Friday night?
I was advised by many people to literally stand outside your school everyday and beg for admission for my baby. I do know of many who have done this and they still were rejected. My principles and my self respect would never allow me to grovel for something which is my child's fundamental right. I have been educated in one of the finest boarding schools in India and I sat an admission test at the age of 6 to secure my admission there. I cannot remember seeing my parents bow to such disgracefulness as what is seen in schools such as yours.
Things have however worked out for the better. My child will be starting school in a much better and far more child-centric school. I know that your school's popularity is short lived. No institution built on dishonesty can survive.
Best regards,
It's been a few months since this happened and although things have worked out for the better, now that Neel is going to start preschool in a far better school by my estimation, I still think back in anger to those days of feeling completely dejected. How on earth can an 18 month old be rejected from anything? How can a baby not fulfill any criteria for a play school or play group. Obviously, it had more to do with us as parents. We just didn't know the right people. Never before had I been exposed to such ridiculousness that is our education system in India. We had been naive. We just didn't think that an 18 month old could become a victim to such a corrupt system so early on in life.
I have since written a letter to the chairman of this school, which my husband won't let me send. I've decided to post it here because I have to vent my anger somehow:
Dear Mr. Chairman,
My 18 month old son's admission application to your pre school was recently rejected. I find it hard to believe how an 18 month old can have any short comings on the basis of which he gets rejected to the first institution he has ever applied to in his life. Yes, I have heard from your
school staff that a fair lucky draw takes place and that the admission procedure is completely transparent. I wasn't invited to any lucky draw event and nor was I witness to any, so I apologise if I don't take your word for it. If the entire procedure is transparent, make it visible and I'm sure us parents would be more than happy to participate.
I live barely 5 minutes away from your preschool and am aware that a couple of children in my neighbourhood have started attending the new session in your school. I have been told that their parents pulled the 'right strings' with the faculty of your school. I obviously was under
the impression that a popular and highly sought after school such as yours would not resort to such 'discriminatory' practices when it came to providing the first step towards a formal education for thousands of innocent young minds. These are just small babies Mr. Chairman. How can a school discriminate one from the other on the basis of what car their parents drive or who they party with on a Friday night?
I was advised by many people to literally stand outside your school everyday and beg for admission for my baby. I do know of many who have done this and they still were rejected. My principles and my self respect would never allow me to grovel for something which is my child's fundamental right. I have been educated in one of the finest boarding schools in India and I sat an admission test at the age of 6 to secure my admission there. I cannot remember seeing my parents bow to such disgracefulness as what is seen in schools such as yours.
Things have however worked out for the better. My child will be starting school in a much better and far more child-centric school. I know that your school's popularity is short lived. No institution built on dishonesty can survive.
Best regards,
Thursday, June 23, 2011
Confessions of a budget travelling mum!
Here's what happens when you travel with a baby, a cranky husband and too much luggage on a budget airline:
1. You risk getting deep vein thrombosis while standing for what seems like eternity in the check in queue at the airport. Trust me, doing a prior web check in doesn't help at all. I'm pretty sure that budgeted airlines have a web check in facility just because...just because!
While in the queue, you're seriously amazed at how well behaved your baby is. "The queue is just a minor hiccup", you think oh so innocently, "this journey is going on be a breeze". You ignore your baby's little squirms.
2. You steer dangerously close to having a nervous break down when after a half hour of standing in the queue and another 20 minutes of system failures, you're handed your boarding pass only to notice that you've been given separate seats at two different ends of the plane. Another 10 minutes of arguing ensues followed by 15 minutes of system corrections.
By now Baby wants out of the stroller. A minor tantrum is starting to take place. You hand him a lollipop and he starts to calm down. You STILL keep the faith!
3. You risk broken bones, bruises and some serious physical injury while trying to board the plane in what seems like a stampede. As soon as the boarding announcement is made, hoards of passengers make a beeline for the plane. You nudge your way through in complete horror.
Baby starts to cry. Can you blame him?
4. You risk a burst blood vessel in your head as you try to control your temper while asking the air hostess, for the umpteenth time, for a baby seat belt. Why is this even an option?
Baby is starting to erupt into a massive tantrum. You've now started making some strange, often embarrassing noises in an attempt to shush baby.
5. You risk scalding yourself and baby as you try and feed yourself while rocking the baby to sleep at the same time. Yup, you guessed it, there are no bassinets on a budget airline.
Baby is exhausted. You heave a sigh of relief!
Once you land and are told that your baby's stroller will be handed over to you right at the other end of the airport, you really don't care. You
somehow drag your tired and battered body out of the plane, heaving a pile of luggage, a baby and an even crankier husband in tow.
Next time ( yes, there will be a next because we always live in hope) I'll remember to get us some travel / medical insurance.
Someone once said, "There are three critical states of human life: illness, captivity and travel". Budget airlines sure have mastered the art of making you experience all three states of mind, all in a matter of a few hours.
1. You risk getting deep vein thrombosis while standing for what seems like eternity in the check in queue at the airport. Trust me, doing a prior web check in doesn't help at all. I'm pretty sure that budgeted airlines have a web check in facility just because...just because!
While in the queue, you're seriously amazed at how well behaved your baby is. "The queue is just a minor hiccup", you think oh so innocently, "this journey is going on be a breeze". You ignore your baby's little squirms.
2. You steer dangerously close to having a nervous break down when after a half hour of standing in the queue and another 20 minutes of system failures, you're handed your boarding pass only to notice that you've been given separate seats at two different ends of the plane. Another 10 minutes of arguing ensues followed by 15 minutes of system corrections.
By now Baby wants out of the stroller. A minor tantrum is starting to take place. You hand him a lollipop and he starts to calm down. You STILL keep the faith!
3. You risk broken bones, bruises and some serious physical injury while trying to board the plane in what seems like a stampede. As soon as the boarding announcement is made, hoards of passengers make a beeline for the plane. You nudge your way through in complete horror.
Baby starts to cry. Can you blame him?
4. You risk a burst blood vessel in your head as you try to control your temper while asking the air hostess, for the umpteenth time, for a baby seat belt. Why is this even an option?
Baby is starting to erupt into a massive tantrum. You've now started making some strange, often embarrassing noises in an attempt to shush baby.
5. You risk scalding yourself and baby as you try and feed yourself while rocking the baby to sleep at the same time. Yup, you guessed it, there are no bassinets on a budget airline.
Baby is exhausted. You heave a sigh of relief!
Once you land and are told that your baby's stroller will be handed over to you right at the other end of the airport, you really don't care. You
somehow drag your tired and battered body out of the plane, heaving a pile of luggage, a baby and an even crankier husband in tow.
Next time ( yes, there will be a next because we always live in hope) I'll remember to get us some travel / medical insurance.
Someone once said, "There are three critical states of human life: illness, captivity and travel". Budget airlines sure have mastered the art of making you experience all three states of mind, all in a matter of a few hours.
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